‘It’s not how much we give but how much love we put into giving.’
If you do not do something or give something from your heart, then do not give anything.. and perhaps it is better not to do anything at all.
Things you give to someone, or help that does not come from the heart, usually comes at a high cost. And that is not help.
When you give from the heart and with love, there are no expectations. I wish more people understood that.
Also, no amount of help you give someone justifies treating that person as inferior, nor does it give you the right to throw it back in their face by listing everything you have done for them. Because again, that is not help.
When someone uses help to establish a power dynamic or humiliate the person receiving it, it stops being support and becomes a tool for control and manipulation.
It negates the act of giving. It turns help into a debt that can never truly be repaid, leaving the person receiving it trapped in a cycle of obligation and guilt. It destroys trust.
And all of this speaks about you. If someone is ungrateful, reminding them of everything you have done for them will not make them grateful. It only says something about you. If someone is ungrateful, you always have other choices, such as setting boundaries.. especially in the future.
I wish people understood that our actions speak for us. Or rather, the INTENTIONS behind those actions do. Different people can do exactly the SAME thing with completely different intentions and motives. Yet many people never stop to ask themselves what their intentions really are when they do, give or say something.
Everything comes down to the intentions behind what we do and what we say, because those intentions reveal who we are as individuals.
Our intentions reveal who we are. They also reveal our values and how we value other people.
Today, people are often valued for their money or their position rather than for who they are. Respect is too often based on what someone can offer us instead of who that person is.
It has reached the point where some people ‘evaluate’ you based on the phone you own.
If it were not true, it would be funny. Instead, it reveals the values many people live by today. A poverty of spirit. Fortunately, not all of us are the same.
Now ask yourself this.. speaking of giving, love, values and intentions.
Imagine you need financial help. This is a hypothetical example, and I am exaggerating a little to make the point clearer. Two people offer to help you. One gives you €20. The other gives you €500. Would you appreciate them equally? Or would you feel more grateful to the one who gave you €500?
Be honest before you read any further.
Now imagine you discover that the first person gave you everything they had, leaving themselves without dinner that night. Meanwhile, the second had €150,000 in their account, and their €500 came with the expectation of getting something in return.
What then? Did your answer change? Interesting, wasn’t it?
One of the reasons I dislike the myths surrounding famous people is the way they are portrayed as superheroes simply because they donate money. And no, that is not their fault. It is society that places them on that pedestal.
First.. why do football players earn such absurd amounts of money? Why actors? Why are they considered so important? What about doctors, teachers, caregivers or people who dedicate their lives to helping others? Why is there such an enormous imbalance? And then, why do we turn wealthy people into superheroes simply because they donate part of what they earn? Especially when the media makes sure everyone knows about it.
Stupidity.
Help should come naturally, especially if you have more than enough money for yourself, because there are people who have not had that same ‘luck’.
So give me the real superheroes. The ones next door. I want to know how much love you put into giving, because that is what tells me who you are. Not HOW MUCH you give. Not WHAT you give. But HOW you give. How much love you put into giving.
This isn’t the only text. But today, it might be enough.