‘In ancient Greece (469-399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom. One day the great philosopher was approached by an acquaintance, who ran up to him excitedly and said, ‘Socrates, do you know what I just heard about one of your students?’, ‘Wait a moment’, Socrates replied. ‘Before you tell me, I’d like you to pass a little test. It’s called the Test of Three.’
‘Test of Three?’ ‘That’s correct’, Socrates continued. ‘Before you talk to me about my student let’s take a moment to test what you’re going to say. The first test is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?’
‘No,’ the man replied, ‘actually I just heard about it.’ ‘All right’, said Socrates. ‘So you don’t really know if it’s true or not. Now let’s try the second test, the test of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my student something good?
‘No, on the contrary..’ ‘So,’ Socrates continued, ‘you want to tell me something bad about him even though you’re not certain it’s true?’
The man shrugged, a little embarrassed.
Socrates continued, ‘You may still pass, though, because there is a third test – the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my student going to be useful to me?’
‘No, not really..’ ‘Well,’ concluded Socrates, ‘if what you want to tell me is neither true nor good nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?’
The man was defeated and ashamed and said no more. This is one of the reasons Socrates was considered a great philosopher and was held in such high esteem.’
Socrates – Triple filter test – Truthfulness, goodness and usefulness.
I actually try to live by these principles.. in my own way.
Because if I want to stop the spread of evil by those who spread it.. I cannot expect everyone to understand my intentions. Not everyone will stop and ask themselves what they are actually doing. Instead, they become upset because you refuse to approve of or participate in what they are doing. So they simply move on, looking for another ‘victim’ who will listen, join in and help spread their rumours.
And that is exactly my intention.. to stop it from spreading further.. and to make you question whether what you are doing serves any good purpose.
I understand that gossip among friends can feel sweet, just let that sweetness stay there and not create problems in other people’s lives. Very often, that sweetness is nothing more than disguised bitterness. Malicious gossip often reflects personal unhappiness.
Today, gossip and lies travel so fast.. and they can cause enormous damage.
Those who invent rumours, and those who embellish them before passing them on.. are the ones who cause that damage and become the root of the problem. They are like weeds among flowers. And like any weed.. they need to be pulled out by the roots.
That is just another reason why I cannot stand rumours.. and even less the people who create and spread them.
It seems that many people enjoy sharing secrets or gossiping about others. They enjoy hearing something before it becomes public. They enjoy rumours and giving opinions about other people’s lives instead of paying attention to their own.. never realising that they themselves are often the subject of rumours too.
I understand that rumours are created by unhappy, dissatisfied and manipulative people.. and spread by equally dissatisfied, bored and not very intelligent ones. Only someone who is deeply unhappy and disconnected from themselves truly enjoys gossip and lies.
When has a lie ever brought anything good? And please.. do not bring up white lies or similar excuses.. just do not.
It amazes me that people never seem to have enough time to stop and reflect.. yet somehow they always have time to spread gossip.
If you think you cannot stop or change the person spreading rumours, or even an entire group of people.. you are right. You cannot. They will change only when they want to, and only if they become aware of what they are doing. You cannot control what other people say or think.. but you can always control yourself.
You can remove yourself from that group. Or you can stop them, interrupt them and simply say: ‘I am not interested.’ Or: ‘Why are you telling me this?’ Or you can simply walk away.
IT IS UP TO YOU.
I do not like lies, injustice, gossip, unnecessary curiosity about other people’s lives or small talk. These are some of the things I usually say. Of course, depending on the situation, the person I am talking to and many other factors.. my response may be different.
Very often, people are surprised or even offended because I refuse to let them fill my mind with garbage. But they do not see it that way. Their ego does not allow them to believe they are doing anything wrong. They even think I am arrogant or antisocial simply because I refuse to participate in manipulation and lies.
So today it is considered normal to feed your mind and soul with garbage, but if you stand up and say: ‘No, I do not want this..’ suddenly that is considered abnormal. Oh, really?
Many people use small talk and gossip to feel important or connected. When you refuse to participate, they feel judged. Your choice becomes a mirror. It reflects their own habits, and that often makes them defensive.
People do not realise that, among many other things, they shape their lives through what they feed their minds and souls.
I do not gossip. I do not like small minds. I do not do small talk. If you do, that is okay. But I do not. Respect that. That is why I will always protect my aura and honour my space.. whether you like it or not.
This isn’t the only text. But today, it might be enough.