Hello you beautiful soul! 🌏🙏
Blood doesn’t make someone family. Love is what makes a family.
‘Family does not mean keeping secrets, walking on eggshells, lying to keep the peace, pretending others are healthy when they are not, tip toeing around the truth, attending events that derail my healing process, defending poor choices, engaging in toxic behavior, remaining loyal to destructive patterns, or sacrificing my needs in an attempt to fix or save others.’
And don’t take this lightly or superficially. I always like to mention that, as well as to add, whatever I say, you will understand as much as, among other things, your consciousness is deep.
Familiar with this? I know I’m. That’s why I choose who I want to be part of my family. I choose my tribe. My tribe has my vibe. And it has nothing to do with blood!
Let go of anyone who doesn’t treat you with respect and get rid of those who don’t accept you for who you are, instead they’re trying to change you, shush you, push you to be something you’re not.
Don’t let people guilt you into being in contact with someone who isn’t good for you physical or mental health.
Protect yourself and stand up for yourself. It’s not selfish, it’s self-respect. Selfish people will say otherwise.
Because selfish people expect you to go along with the music they play, not thinking about yourself, your life, but about them.
They will manipulate you and your emotions, avoiding talking about how you are not respected or how you are treated badly. They will not take responsibility for their actions, but will make you feel guilty.
Never forget this:
You don’t owe anyone an explanation for taking care of yourself!
You are allowed to walk away from anyone who hurt you!
Learn to recognize all harmful relationships and to end them when nothing changes for the better. If I could do it, you can too.
Mental health is crucial for your well being.
Blood means nothing, feeling loved and respected means everything!
Do not accept as something normal, what you know and feel is not! It’s about you and your health.
Also about all those who look up to you. And you want to be an example for others to follow, don’t you?
Whether you are or not.. will be the same answer you give to this question: Do you want the same life as yours for your child or children (if you don’t have them, imagine that you have them)?
Because love is what makes a family.
‘Just because someone is “family” doesn’t mean you have to tolerate lies, chaos, drama, manipulation and disrespect.’
This is just one of the established beliefs that must be questioned and that must be changed.. if you think it is necessary.
That’s why I would like to tickle your brain and make you wonder and ponder.
‘Just because someone is “family” doesn’t mean you have to tolerate lies, chaos, drama, manipulation and disrespect.’
Just because someone is family, blood related.. it DOESN’T MEAN that you have to keep them in your life, if they’re “toxic“.
Blood sometimes means nothing. Trust me.
I got chills when I hear: “They are still your family..”
This belief.. many people are taking advantage of it, abusing other members of the family. They think they have right to do so just because you are a family, so you have to put up with it. Because, hey it’s so normal.
That’s how we live, that’s how we’ve been taught, that it’s normal. NORMAL?!
That ‘normal’ made many to become abnormal.
They can cause you nothing but trouble in your life.. and even after you say how they make you feel.. they change nothing regardless. Again, thinking that you have to accept it, that you will stay, because you are family.
Finally, you decide not to accept something that is ‘abnormal’ as ‘normal’ and you try to explain it to them, but again nothing changes.. so as a final decision you choose to cut off contacts with them..
On top of everything instead of reflecting, they get very angry, because: what gives you the right to do that, they are family! Blood! How dare you to leave the family?
So, manipulating further, they do everything in their power to make you feel bad.
Dear, if you are familiar with this, don’t ever feel bad for saving yourself. These are all signs that should tell you that you didn’t actually do anything wrong, you made the RIGHT DECISION and SAVED YOURSELF, and all those who come after you and whom your decision and courage helped to get rid of toxic relationships, manipulators, abusers.
My body hurts seeing situations like this. Because I experienced it on my skin.
Are you aware that very often.. kid’s first bullies are their parents?
Many people grow up adopting this belief and pattern of behaviour thinking that’s normal way to live the life, passing it to the next generation.. break the circle please! For you and for next generations!
No.. it’s not normal to be a victim of abuse.
No, it is not normal to remain silent and accept oppression as something normal.
No.. it’s not normal to suffer just because someone is your family.
No.. it’s not normal to live with those who cause you pain.
Just because you can take it, doesn’t mean you have to! Be brave for yourself. And stand up for yourself. Speak up!
And remember: Blood doesn’t make someone family. Love is what makes a family.
Depending on when you’re reading this, I wish you either a beautiful day or a good night, you beautiful soul!
Love and namaste,
Irina 🦄💙
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