‘While everyone falls in love with her smile, she waits for the one who will fall in love with her scars.’
He or she. Gender doesn’t matter because this isn’t about gender division.. it’s about true love. Love is something we all want, need and should cultivate in our lives. Self-love above all.
The point is not simply to find love.. but to truly live it. Real love. And in order to get there, we first need to understand what love actually is — if we haven’t already learned it.
So love yourself first. Exactly as you are. Accept everything that belongs to you.. both what you see as flaws and what you see as strengths.
And I know that’s difficult, because most of us were never taught the importance of self-love.
Which is exactly why you have to learn it FOR YOURSELF.
Because we all carry scars. Some visible. Some invisible. Perhaps still unhealed wounds. And very often we look at those scars or wounds as proof that we are less beautiful, less worthy or somehow less deserving of love because of them. I know I did.
Because..
Unlike many people, I carry both external and internal scars.. the result of a serious motorcycle accident and countless surgeries, together with consequences I have had to learn to live with. One of those consequences is precisely the scars themselves — and the external ones often lead to internal ones.
Yes.. the scars on my body are visible. And they are deeply intertwined with those inside.. that were wounds once. Those scars beneath run so much deeper. They left marks.. on my entire life. It took me a very long time to accept all of them — the ones outside and the ones inside. And yes.. healing was incredibly difficult.
Acceptance helped. Changing my mindset helped even more. I stopped seeing them as something shameful or negative, as I once did.. because my body would never be the same again. Instead, I chose to focus on the story behind them. On who I became.
And I didn’t become who I am today because of the accident itself.. not at all.
I became who I am thanks to me, my resilience and the choices I made because of that horrible accident.
Even today there are days when that acceptance becomes difficult again. Pain appears. Limitations appear. And as I said.. my body is no longer what it once was. And sometimes.. that can be very hard to see and to live with. At least for me.
That is why I know how difficult it is to accept yourself physically.. and then to face everything that created wounds and scars on the inside as well.
But you have to. And no.. I don’t mean that as a command. You don’t have to.. but you probably should. Because of yourself. To make life easier for yourself.
Don’t expect others to know how to love you.. before you learn how to love yourself in the way you wish others would love you.
Because that’s how it all starts.
Love everything that belongs to you.. starting from within. Your scars are part of YOU. They represent your story. Your life. Your journey. Don’t hide them. Not from yourself and not from others. Own them instead. Think about who you became afterwards.
What do your scars tell you about you? How did you manage to heal your wounds? What did you learn from those painful situations?
Be proud of surviving difficult situations.. because hopefully you transformed yourself into someone stronger, wiser and even more beautiful. No, situations don’t choose who you will become.. you do. And if that is true.. why would you hide it?
The right person for you will love you because of it, not despite it. And that’s the point! To be with someone who sees your value and who you are.. and loves you just for that!
Someone who reminds you how beautiful you are.. especially on the days when it becomes difficult for you to see that beauty in yourself. Someone who kisses your scars a little longer on those days. And then.. your smile quietly returns on its own.
Be with the one who looks at you as if you were the most beautiful person in the world. The one who loves you even more and holds you even tighter when you reveal your scars. The one who kisses them gently.. who creates space where you can be entirely vulnerable, knowing your rawest parts are met with profound tenderness and devotion.
That’s what intimacy is. Honesty. Safety.
This isn’t the only text. But today, it might be enough.