‘They don’t lie to you because the truth would hurt your feelings. They lie to you because the truth might provoke you to make choices that no longer serve their interests.’
I really hate when people assume things about me.. and I don’t use the word ‘hate’ easily or often. So you can imagine how much I cannot stand lies.
Especially when those assumptions have absolutely nothing to do with who I am.
This also includes people deciding to ‘protect’ me by not telling me the truth because they think I’m going to get angry or mad.
So.. they decide to LIE.
Oh.. pardon my French, but that’s absolute fucking bullshit. It’s not just being rude.. it’s also being manipulative. Your responsibility is to tell the truth. If I get mad.. let me get mad.
You don’t get to decide what is right for me.
Your responsibility is to act as my friend and to tell me the truth. To think about me, not about you. My responsibility is to handle it.
You’re not doing this to protect me or anyone else.. you’re doing it to protect yourself.
You don’t want to be the ‘bad guy’ because you’re afraid people might change their opinion about you, so you hide behind lies, instead of being honest.
And in doing so, you decide to manipulate someone else’s life and potentially lead them down a path they never would have chosen for themselves.
And who the fuck are you to decide for other people’s lives?!
So, some of the issues behind your behavior are:
1. You are not honest.
2. You worry about what other people think of you.
3. The people who ‘love you’ do not even love the real you.. but the version of yourself you created for them.
4. You are loyal to your needs and to what you get from them, not to them as people.
5. You care more about how people see you and about protecting your image than about what is truly right for them.
6. You are a manipulator.
Now reverse the situation.
How would you feel if someone manipulated your choices and your life because they assumed they knew what was best for you?
If someone lies to you.. that is selfishness, irresponsibility and lack of respect.
Cowardice.
And lies create far more damage and problems than many people realize. Maybe you already experienced it yourself.
And again: Who are you to decide the direction of someone else’s life and what their life should look like?!
Remember: you do not get to decide what is good for others based on your personal opinions, fears or comfort.
Allow people to decide for themselves what is right for their own life.
So let me conclude with this:
And if the truth truly needs to be said — no matter how difficult it is — then say it. It’s up to you to analyze and feel it.
Of course, not everything in life is easy or pleasant, and some truths are especially difficult to express and even harder to accept.
It will not always be easy.. but find a respectful and honest way to say it.
What you CAN do is help people face the truth.. instead of hiding it from them behind lies and manipulation.
Or would you rather live a comforting lie than face a painful truth?
‘Better the hard truth than a comforting fantasy.’
Your actions and your INTENTIONS always reveal who you truly are.
So if you lie.. what does that say about you?This isn’t the only text. But today, it might be enough.